We've always known that we would adopt. From the very beginning of our marriage we have known that the Lord has called us to share our home and our hearts with children that were not born into a family.
After our son, Josiah, was born in such a traumatic way in July of 2010, we were advised not to have any more children biologically. We knew that we wanted more, we had hoped that all of our kids could be fairly close in age, and knowing that adoptions usually take a while, we started the "foster-to-adopt" process in early 2011. In March, we had an adoption counselor come to our house, meet our family, and conduct our first interview. We were approved to begin the process and I had ALL of the paperwork filled out within a week.
And it sat there in the dining room for 6 months.
That huge stack of papers took hours to go through and I just tucked it all back into the folder and left it there. I thought about sending it in every single day, but I just never could bring myself to do it. I was terrified of the "foster-to-adopt" program because I knew that there was always the risk of bringing the child home, loving him or her as our own for months, and then unexpectedly having them removed from our home. The process of adopting a foster child takes forever, and I knew that I would be afraid to get attached to "my" child because of the fear of losing them.
We thought "foster-to-adopt" was our only real option since domestic adoption is crazy expensive and foreign adoption…well, that's like "remortgage-your-house" expensive.
Oh, we of little faith. We had taken matters into our own hands and, as a result, spent all that time wondering if we were doing the right thing.
Little did we know that God was readying our hearts and preparing us to hear from Him in a massive way. In a way that would require us to trust Him like never before.
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